My Daughter’s DAD: the person that I solely give credit for making me the best mom. My husband has been there for me from the time when we found out I was pregnant to holding my hand, and helping me take breaths as I screamed in delivery pain. He left his job midday and accompanied me to every doctor’s appointment, sonogram, and held my arm down when the nurse wanted to draw blood.
Fact: My husband started his fatherly duties from the time when my daughter was in the womb. He made sure that I was well taken care. He brought me the best prenatal vitamins in the market and made sure I ate them. He believed in the benefits of coconut water, and hunted down every store and fruit stands for fresh coconuts. Believe it or not, coconuts are rare to find during the winter. He made dinner for me as I came up with every excuse to avoid cooking. Since I conceived right after marriage, we never got to go on a honeymoon. He became inventive and took me on two babymoons: Atlantic City and Boston.
Overwhelmed with the changes in body during pregnancy, I was even more fearful of how I would raise my daughter. My husband was always there to reassure me, and tell me that I would learn with time. I often adored him as I witnessed his unconditional love for his nieces. He was there when they went in the emergency and available to take them on adventures. My husband would be the perfect dad. In fact, he accompanied me to the operation room with his scrubs (after a scare from epidural), and shed tears when we first heard my daughter cry. He was elated when he held my daughter, Samarah, for the first time. I had to wait – but I did not mind for she was in the best hands.
In the hospital, I was very determined to breastfeed my Samarah, but I could never hold her in position for her to latch. My husband stepped in and held her, while I figured out how to latch her. All the nurses complimented him, saying that they have never seen a father like him before.
The real fun started when we came home. I was on rest for two weeks to recover from the C-section while my mother-in-laws stayed up nights to feed Samarah. My husband used all his vacation time and took care of Samarah during the day. He did everything- from feeding, burping, changing clothes and diapers. Holding a baby seemed frightening to me. I had held a baby before, but now I would have to do it full time. I needed training – and my husband held my hand and showed me everything. Whether it was how to sanitize bottle and prepare milk to cleaning my daughter after wet diapers. Then came the days when Samarah would not sleep at night, and we could not calm her down during the day. She would not sleep at all. Feeling disturbed at 12 PM, my husband come home from his work and put our daughter to sleep. He would not leave until she was sound asleep. There are many nights that my husband gave up to make Samarah, and spent exhausting days at work.
My C-section meant that I could not do heavy labor. After our marriage, till this day, I have never done the laundry, washed the dishes, or Samarah’s clothes – my husband is there for everything. Samarah loves to watch daddy washing her clothes. My husband always takes Samarah to the doctor. He cries when the doctors give Samarah injections. In fact, Samarah loves her dad so much that she would wake up when her father left and came back from work. She often looks for her dad and refuses to drink her milk when it is past her father’s arrival. Samarah becomes excited when we both sit to play with her.
Fatherly love is diminishing as divorce rates are plateauing. Mothers grab custody of the child, and fathers diligently pay child support. Equal parenting – where both partners balance and put effort into raising a child produces people with balanced emotional intelligence and minds cultivated for lifelong learning, and success. Marriages may fail, but a father’s love for a child is eternal, and it would never wane. Views about marriages being the “norm” has changed where people hesitate. My advice for choosing a partner: look for a great DAD! Dads a responsible and you know your family will have a solid foundation. Honestly, I accepted my husband’s proposal after I saw him befriend his best friend’s daughter by giving her his phone to play.
In conclusion, raising a child takes effort, patience, passions, and many other things. Having a partner that is always will to put 100% make the journey of raising a child blissful. A perfect dad is not just one that brings the child into the world- but one that is always there when the child needs- in any shape or form. Dads should not be forgotten, or honored only on one day during the year, but they should be appreciated every day.
My daughter’s dad is my teacher and I will always learn from him how to raise Samarah. I am proud of my husband.